Water is calm and wind feels so warm it's like summer saying it's final goodbyes. Venla sits by the sea and enjoys her time in Turku. She met her new friend Ellie, got to see so many interesting places and get her thoughts together. Feels the same when she realized she was just second best option to Eetu. She's not even that to Ilari so it's best just to forget any feelings she has towards him. Ok, girl. Time to get back to home, face the new disappointments. Then she remembers getting a heart from certain big mouthed gamer. Well then. Let's give him a chance.
- So what IS wrong? Tanja asks when they are stepping outside. Susanna put up a little getogether but Venla has hard time to get into mood. -You've been moody lately.
– I need another operation, Venla looks into the sky. This has been eating her out since she met her doctor.
- Again? Why?
- There's a badly pinned nerve that causes a lot of pain.
- Darn.
- Mm.
- Is it big one on this time? Tanja looks worried.
- I don't know yet.
– Are you going back to wheelchair?
- I don't know! Venla cries out. -I'm so frigging scared of it. Even thought of going back to hospital is horrifying. I thought it was over!
- Me too, Tanja sighs. -Hopefully it's the last one and pain would be gone for good.
- I'm not afraid of pain, Venla pushes fingers to her temples. -It's no stranger to me. I can't stand the idea of being hospitalized again. I hate the smells, sounds, everything about it. It brings everything back and I don't want wheelchair back! Venla’s voice breaks and she has to fight not to cry. -I'm so tired of this!
-Oh honey, Tanja says and hugs her friends. -I'll be there with you. Again.
-I know.
- Love you
– You too.
-But I need to go back inside. I'm so cold my tits will fall off. Venla laughs.
-I'll come later. I still need a minute.
- What happened to you? Iiro asks, appears around the corner and sits besides Venla.
- Huh, you scared me! Venla gasps. - You were listening?
-Sorry and sorry. I was already here. Needed some alone time. Iiro shrugs. – So what was that all about?
– Carcrash, Venla says it all with one word. – Got it pretty bad. Iiro nods. He takes a scarf away and shows a long scar on base of his neck.
- Cancer. He replies mutually with one word. They are silent for a moment.
– Is it still active? Venla gets curious.
- No. It was operated on time, Iiro says and looks towards sunset. They both are quite moody today.
- So how are you now?
- Alive. He looks at Venla. -You?
- Alive. He hmmps.
- I've been diagnosed clear for six years now, he tells. - Thatswhy I'm in the army this late. They wanted to make sure I cannot get sick at the service.
– I was wondering about that. You don't look like a 18 years old.
- What? Iiro fakes being offended. – And I thought I'm well preserved. Venla laughs at his remark. – I’m so upset my babyface doesn't work anymore.
- So how old you are then?
- 27, he replies. - A year more and I'd slipped away from their grasp. But no luck.
- Army… are you going to follow your brother's career?
- Hell I am. It's sucks so much I cannot find words to it. Still, have to endure 4 months more. Then it's done.
- So confusing. Venla frowns.
– Nah, I work fulltime as an AD and have my own things going on. Bro just needed some certainty and stability in his life. Army was that to him.
- Oh. Why? Venla wants to know more. There's no denying that Ilari intrigued her.
– That’s a long story.
- I'm not going anywhere, Venla points out.
- Then we need more booze, Iiro states. - I'm not going into worst parts of our lifes half sober.
- Ok now, Iiro brings bottle of red wine and offers it to Venla. – Hope you like red? Venla nods.
– If it needs full bottle of wine, this must be something bad, Venla thinks aloud.
- Wait and weep, Iiro replies. Venla raises her brows. -We are from broken family. To be honest, quite fucked up family, Iiro tells. – My parents split up and I think I was mom's last try to make us a happy family. When it didn't work out, she completely lost interest on us and dad left. Iiro takes a long sigh and takes a long drink of wine.
- After divorce she kept disappearing for days and usually was too drunk to care about anything on this world. Actually, I really don’t remember so much about her, I have to relay what Ilari told me. Bro needed to grow too fast and get tough to took care of me when our mother disappeared. Got something to eat for us, beat up anyone who tried to bully me and so on. He did that for year before social services took us in.
- Omg. I didn’t know, Venla blinks.
- Quite a bargain for a 11year old preteen. If I got it bad, Ilari got the shitload. Our lives were more like daily chaos back then. See now why he likes order and discipline?
- What happened after that? Venla is schocked.
– We lived with our granparents some years before dad came back to Finland and took us into his new Family. I got a new family, dad back, Iida and Warda. It wasn’t that bad.
– I’ve met Warda once, Venla rubs her temples. - I can’t handle how young she looked.
– Not only looked, Iiro reminds. – She’s young. I told you. Fucked up family.
-Oookay. You were right. I need a drink. Venla takes a swig straight from the bottle. - I'm so sorry for you.
-Don’t be. Life isn't fair. Iiro seems to seem surprisingly ok with his past.
- I guess you are right.
- And then I got sick. Got 40% chance of survival.
-Oh god no, Venla covers her face. – I only lost my parents in that carcrash. Iiro snorts.
– Shit. You haven't had an easy life either.
Comments
Post a Comment
How did this make you feel? Share your thoughts here!